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I think about how the best sex in my life has come from total immersion, and I start to wonder if perhaps all these blessings apply equally to my marriage: truly ugly, truly beautiful, the roll of the ocean over and over again until it's quiet.November 22, 2017How to help when disaster strikes ............................................................................Each Hebrew phrase thanks God for creation, connection, and knowledge.The blessing for the mikvah is no different — it is simple and straightforward, a woman thanking God for commanding her to immerse herself.
I can already hear a collective sigh of frustration from secular women everywhere, but hear me out.
I was beginning to hate the rigid restrictions on my sex life until the other day, when I was sitting on a blanket with my two toddlers in a suburban Detroit park, eating pretzels from Ziploc bags and listening to other moms talking about their sex lives."So what if I pass you the ketchup! "It's not going to make me have sex with you right here.""I kinda like having these nuances," my husband said quietly. But there is joy in it, too — which is why I joined the thousands of , Jews who abandon secular life for the incredible passion that results from devotion to the Torah. After a 45-minute soak, full of peaceful reading, then scrubbing, combing, and rinsing, I am ready to descend into the mikvah's waters. "Kosher." "Kosher."When I am finished, as always, I ask for a moment by myself. It is my most religious moment."Please," I whisper to the tiles, and emerge into cold air.
"I miss you, but it's exciting when I can just come up behind you at the sink, lift your hair, and nuzzle your neck. And Avy was reminding me of one of the greatest joys: sex. I follow a woman down a silent, tiled hall until I reach an unmarked door and walk through it. I take off my robe and step in until the water reaches my shoulders. The kind woman who assisted me steps outside to wait. Afterward, I whip off the towels and pull on the pink, see-through underwear that rides low on my hips.
There's no blessing over sex, but every time I go to the mikvah I think about all the Hebrew blessings: the one for the first time you see the ocean, the one for overcoming danger, the blessing for a major purchase (a house, a car, an Armani suit).
There are blessings for rainbows, lightning, mountains, truly ugly or beautiful people.